E_ection, is that a dirty word?
Teensy tiny trigger warning on this one folks
I’ve missed the last two STSC Symposiums because of performance issues. I suppose that is to be expected as one ages and all that. I failed to come up with anything until it was too late. This time I felt more pressure to submit because I suggested the topic. I’m sick to death of politics and thought that the STSC people were so creative that they could do an entire Symposium, an Election Special on elections without being political. Well of course they can! But before the topic was finalized
made a bawdy reference to the similarity of the words election, erection, and even ejection, so we decided to expand the subject from election to e_ection.As for me, I understood his thinking because every US election season, among the 24/7 broadcast bombardment, I never fail to remember the words spoken by Gilda Radner in her role as Emily Litella, a hard of hearing little old lady on Saturday Night Live’s Weekend Update: “What’s all this fuss, I’ve been hearing about the 1976 presidential erection?”1
Still, as much as I am fascinated by erections and disgusted with elections, I couldn’t quite narrow it down to a topic worth expounding on. Despite lots of stimulation no rock hard ideas were popping up.
As often happens, the universe came to the rescue.
posted this note:I did NOT know that Ray! I didn’t know anything about the word origin of slogan at all, with public education being what it is and all that, this had escaped my notice for far too long. Anyway, BOING! there it was, the idea. I could write about election slogans and political stunts but only those of a naughty nature.
As I came of voting age in the US in the 1970’s, the first unofficial slogan I remember was an anti Richard Nixon one. Don’t change Dicks in the middle of a screw, vote for Nixon in ‘72. In my innocent days that was pretty heady stuff and I supposed my generation to be the first to be so bold as to make overt sexual references in politics. After all, we popularlized the anti war slogan Make Love not War. Surely we were brave and free, the first to use sexuality blatently to slam a candidate. Those were the days when the word fuck was still completely and utterly filthy, shocking, low form, and secretly my favorite cuss word. We were not even close to the first. Just a tiny bit of research, all I am willing to do, produces tons of tawdry tidbits.
Let’s start in the US in the 1800’s. I’m quite sure that there are many such instances before this throughout history and world wide but sayings such as Aching for Attilla and Gooey for Genghis never made it to Wikipedia.
Henry Clay, a respected Kentucky statesman, was running for president in 1844 with a running mate by the name of Theodore Frelinghuysen. With such a mouthful of a name, Frelinghuysen doesn’t exactly roll off the tongue, they had to come up with something easy to help the public remember how to pronouce ‘ol Frelinghuysen’s name. This was not Henry’s first campaign. His others had failed. He was taking his final shot and his campaign came up with Hurrah! Hurrah! The Country's Risin', for Henry Clay and Frelinghuysen! To my mind, this is the moment in US political history that it all started turning to shit. Clearly , with only men permitted to vote, the “risin” part of this slogan was a dog whistle sexual reference to supercharge the patriarchy.
Franklin Pierce elected to the US presidency in 1852 had one of the most overtly sexual slogans: We Polked you in '44, We shall Pierce you in '52. Pierce them he did. He fucked an entire nation when he signed the Kansas-Nebraska Act which permitted the expansion of slavery to the west and set the wheels in motion for the Civil War. What a complete and total dick. When somebody tells you what they are going to do, believe them.
Fast forward to the 1928 US presidential campaign. Al Smith was running against Herbert Hoover. One of Al’s campaign issues was anti prohibition. He favored the repeal of the18th amendment , the one prohibiting the sale of alcohol. His slogan was: Make your wet dreams come true. Of course the official explantion was that wet refered to alcohol and his stance in favor of repeal. But we know he was really talking about something else. He lost, because women could vote in 1928 and his slogan was just disgusting.
LBJ supposedly had a big weiner. He named it Jumbo and it is widely reported that he would take it out for display on many occaisions.2 He seemed fixated on size comparisons, so it is not surprising that his slogan was All the Way for LBJ.
Think sexual innuendo in modern politics is limited to the US? No way! What about the famous erection of Boris Johnson’s Massive Blue Cock on Trafalgar Square3? So many levels of troll on that one. Or the fictional Belgium candidate Tania Derveaux who promised 40000 blow jobs if you signed up to support her.4 In Russia there is an oft repeated folk rhyme “ Голосуй — не голосуй, Всё равно получишь хуй! “ Which roughly translated is “Vote or don’t vote anyway, you’ll still get a dick at the end of the day, 5 or “Cast your vote or throw it away you’ll get a cock at the end of the day”6 Interestingly, Putin’s name was inserted into this slogan changing it to “Cast your vote or throw it away, you’ll get Putin at the end of the day.”
Sex sells. Most every adult human enjoys it. What better way to bring things to attention politically than sex? Unity and peace are two dreams common to mankind. I share them. We strive for them. We seek mutual fulfillment. It is often illusive, but if we keep at it long and hard. Then someday, at last, we can all come together.
Thank you for reading. All puns are intended. Even the ones you missed. Thanks to Okeanos ,
, and others over at the Soaring Twenties Social Club for their help and suggestions. This is written for the STSC November Symposium E_ection Special.☮️
J
Delightful, clever, and informative - I love it!
Brilliant. Much like men’s egos are related with power, so is their sexual prowess. I love how you exposed the red thread.